She's the Cook!
by TheYaoiMuffin
Summary: After eating a Devil Fruit, Sanji turns into a woman. To turn back into a man he has to eat the Guy Guy Fruit but it will take days to reach! He realises that as time passes he's becoming attracted to none other than Zoro! But does Zoro feel the same way?
1. A Boring Day

**Author's Note** : hey! It's Sleepy here (new nickname heh! thanks daxter!). Back with yet another story though I think I should probably work on the other two…but anyway! This one just flew into my head after I watched a video on youtube featuring my two fav characters from One Piece : Sanji-kwun and Zoro-swan! fan girl squeal if u want to watch it it's called Sanji and Zoro Accidentally in Love. Guess the story won't be that appealing at the beginning cuz I suck at that but eventually it will get better. Unfortunately there's not that much ZoroxSanji in this chapter pout though there is some slight SanjixLuffy to make up for it!

I'm currently married, here on FF to daxterandboxer though from time to time I'm getting this horrible feeling that she's betraying me! I should probably contact L to find out!

**Disclaimer** : One Piece and all it's characters mentioned here belong to Eiichiro Oda. I'm just borrowing them though I wish Sanji, Zoro and Luffy were mine. One day perhaps…

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Chapter 1 : A Boring Day**

It was another bright, sunny day for the Straw Hat Pirates on board the Thousand Sunny. The sea was unnaturally calm and there was no enemy or monster in sight. Yet Luffy's crew didn't consider this as something to be happy about. Excluding maybe Usopp and Chopper, they always loved the thrill of battle and adventure. But to their disappointment, today was not a day for such things. So what had they left to do? Nothing except laying around doing whatever they wanted.

Roronoa Zoro was a good example of this. The swordsman was spending this lovely day in the best way he could : sleeping, with his three katanas tucked safely at his side. His loud yet not highly annoying snores could be heard from as high as the crow's nest, were the quiet Nico Robin was reading an interesting looking archaeology book whilst keeping a sharp lookout for any approaching enemies. Down on the deck, Monkey D. Luffy, Tony Tony Chopper, Usopp and Franky were playing a game of strip poker, a game which Luffy had recently discovered and was awed by it so much that he didn't even complain once when he lost four times in a row, leaving him wearing only his boxers. That is until Nami came over and smacked him in the face for being so idiotic as to not realise that Usopp had been cheating. Meanwhile Sanji, who had been talking to Nami excitedly about recent recipes he had discovered, decided that it was time to prepare lunch for the crew.

As he made his way into the kitchen, the cook decided to serve meat today; due to the fact it had been quite a while since they had any thanks to their captain's never full stomach. But fortunately he had bought a lot of meat the other day and was very happy about finally preparing, for his beloved Nami-swan and Robin-chwan a meal fit for a princess.

xxxxxx

"Jeez Luffy you lost again? Can anyone ever be as stupid as that?"

For the fifth time that day Luffy had miserably lost to another card game. He didn't know how that could have happened. After Nami had made him realise that Usupp was being his usual cheating self he had been extra cautious on how he and the rest were playing but it was to no avail. He had lost again and now according to the stupid rules of the game he had to shed his last remaining article of clothing. He stood up and put his hands underneath his boxers, ready to lower them and show the world the future pirate king's rubber pistol. Zoro had even woken up to witness this once in a lifetime event (probably) and even Robin seemed to be mildly interested in what was happening down below but just as Luffy began pulling his boxers down he found himself back on the floor with a very angry cook straddling him with his hands tightly wrapped around his neck, choking him without any mercy.

"LUFFY! YOU ARE SO DEAD!"

"Sanji let go you're killing me" pleaded Luffy whilst he turned red in the face. "Guys please help me!"

"Sanji-kun what the fuck are you doing?" asked Nami. She wrapped her arms around one of the cook's arms knowing well that Sanji would let go of Luffy if she did that.

"As you wish Nami-swan!" sang Sanji as he danced around Nami with little pink hearts floating around him.

Who would ever understand this guy?

Zoro picked himself up from the floor along with his katanas and walked lazily towards the rest of the crew. This was going to be interesting.

Luffy also got up from the ground, holding his throat looking like someone who just had his neck sliced in half and was trying to keep it adjoined with the rest of his body. He was panting heavily trying to regain all the air he had lost with his tongue hanging out of his mouth.

"WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!" growled Luffy angrily once he had recuperated.

"Huh?" Sanji had completely forgotten that only a few seconds ago he had been trying to murder his own captain. He had been too busy fawning over Nami to remember the reason he had attacked Luffy.

Seriously, who could ever understand him?

But now his murderous intent to slaughter his captain like a pig came back but before dirtying his hands he would try to talk reasonably with his air headed captain.

"Right. Listen Luffy…YOU ATE ALL THE MEAT DIDN'T YOU?!" That said he sprang at Luffy like a mad cat but luckily for Luffy, Franky and Chopper (in his human form) grabbed hold of Sanji's arms and didn't let go until they were sure Sanji had calmed down.

Everyone turned to face Luffy as those horrible words left Sanji's lips. The meat…Luffy…gone! Luffy swore he could see fire dancing in their eyes.

"Yes it's **all** gone and now I can't prepare the fabulous meal I had planned for Nami-swan and Robin-chwan!" whined Sanji. "Luffy I swear I will only give you bread for the rest of the journey!"

Luffy's jaw hit the ground and he could feel that his heart had stopped beating for a second.

"NO WAY! Please Sanji forgive me! Luffy sank to his knees and hugged Sanji's legs and rubbed his face against them trying to look cute and sincerely shaken by what he had just told him. He even managed to put on a convincing pout that would melt even the cold heart of a Sea King. "I promise I won't steal again…for now" The last part was said under his breath.

Sanji looked down into poor Luffy's miserable face and felt his two inner beings fighting furiously against each other, trying to win over Sanji's confused brain. "Aww he looks so cute. Let's cuddle him!" said his good, womanly side. His other side, which he called the Zoro-ish side wasn't that keen on that idea and instead proposed : "Kill that son of a bitch Sanji!".

The cook would have probably followed his Zoro-ish side's advice had it not been for the fact that when he looked down upon his captain once again he realised that Luffy was wearing only his boxers! What's more they were half-way down his hips! Sanji felt himself blush at the sight of Luffy's half exposed rubber gun and after a few seconds of staring, pushed the rubber boy away from him.

"You're forgiven this once Luffy but…uh…" Sanji quickly looked for a reason to explain to the crew why he had forgiven their captain after he had nearly made him faint with fear. "Yeah…you better get some money to pay for the meat once we get to the next island…or else it will be pain for you." he said in a creepy voice just to make sure Luffy understood him.

Luffy gulped and shook his head up and down at a very fast pace and in a small voice answered that he would.

"Good. Now that we have this all cleared up I'm gonna go and cook some fish!" said Sanji with a big smile and with cigarette in mouth and hands in his pockets he walked away towards the kitchen.

This guy was a total mystery.

Everyone sighed and turned to glare at Luffy including Robin who during the argument had descended the crow's nest to come and join the fun. They had eaten fish for two freakin' weeks! Not that they had anything to grumble about Sanji's excellent cooking but eating fish everyday had become sort of lame and they were eager to taste fresh meat but now thanks to their idiotic captain they had to wait two more days for there mouths to taste again some good meat, that is until they reach the next island.

As Sanji disappeared into the kitchen. Nami, Usopp and Franky all jumped onto Luffy and an epic fight broke out which Captain Monkey D. Luffy would remember till the day he died as the only fight which he had lost as a man and a pirate…including his boxers.

xxxxxx

"Hey Ero-cook"

"What the hell do you want marimo? Can't you see I'm busy?!" snapped Sanji with his back to Zoro. He was cutting some vegetables and didn't enjoy the fact that Zoro was looking at his behind. It made him feel uneasy in a way.

The swordsman didn't answer but just let himself fall into a chair and kept on staring at Sanji without uttering a word. He had noticed something strange going on between the cook and Luffy back on the deck, and now wanted to rub his discovery in Mister Prince's face.

After some minutes of complete silence, Sanji lost all patience, and slammed his cutting knife on the counter. He turned around to face Zoro, anger clear on his face. "You better have a good reason to disturb me vegetable head or I swear I'll gonna kick your ass out of here!"

Zoro stood up from the chair which a huge smirk plastered on his face. Sanji knew something nasty was going to come out of the swordsman's mouth. What did that bastard want?

"You know eyebrow freak, I noticed something interesting before. You know what I mean?" Zoro crossed his arms over his chest looking expectantly at the cook.

"What the hell are you talking about marimo? Duh…I knew you came here just to waste my time. Go away!"

Sanji turned his back on him, and as he picked up his knife, he heard Zoro speak again.

"You want me to tell you what I noticed? Very well. You were definitely blushing like a damn tomato when you saw Luffy wearing only his boxers. I saw you, and my eyesight is excellent so it was no mistake."

The cook's mouth hung open in shock at his words. Damn he noticed! What could he say now?

"So? Speechless ero-cook? I didn't imagine you were indeed such a pervert" snickered Zoro.

"You're imagining things you fucking swordsman! I know what you're thinking. That I've suddenly turned homosexual huh? Ok I did blush when I saw Luffy only in his boxers but that was natural! I bet even you would have blushed if you'd seen what I've seen at such a close up view ok? SO SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

Zoro knew the cook would react in this way to his words so he wasn't fazed at all. He had a feeling that what he would say next would shut him up for good. Sometimes this cook was so easy to manipulate.

"But…Usopp, Chopper and Franky were close by too and I didn't even see a hint of a blush on there faces unlike you."

He felt a gush of air next to his face and a second later he was holding a big cutting knife between his index and middle fingers. Sanji had thrown his knife at him.

"Uh oh…you could have hurt me with this you know?" said the green haired swordsman in a mocking voice.

Sanji tried to calm down. What had gotten into him? He had just thrown a knife at one of his nakama! Even though he hated this brainless swordsman he was still something like a friend to him…sometimes. So the stupid marimo head wanted to insinuate that he was gay? Very well he would play along with it.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but are you, perhaps…jealous?"

"WHAT?"

Zoro hadn't expected for the conversation to turn to his favour. He could already feel his face heat up with embarrassment at the blonde's words.

"Are you kidding me? Why should I be jealous? I'm straight ok!"

"It just seemed to me that you were jealous. If not then why did you come here to speak to me about this 'incident?'"

"You're fucking wrong dartboard-eyebrow freak! I came to tease you that's all!" yelled a very flustered Zoro.

"Oh really? Then let me say this. From the little I've seen of Luffy's body I can tell that between you two he would be the hotter one…that is if I were a woman because I am **not** gay!"

Zoro was speechless. Luffy's body was better then his? No fucking way! He was absolutely certain that he was way hotter than their rubber captain. Damn love-cook.

"Now please go away. I've had enough of you and if you're hungry you'd better get the hell out of here or else you'll get nothing understand?"

The green head just grunted in response and stomped out of the door, clearly very angry that he lost to Sanji. Luffy hotter then him. Never.

When he was sure that he was gone, the smoking, blonde cook turned back to slicing up the vegetables and muttered inaudibly. "What an idiot that marimo is."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Author's note** : Finally that took forever but I really enjoyed myself writing it! After such hard work I expect anyone who reads it to be so kind as to review too. Since this is my first One Piece fic I don't know if all the characters were in character so pls tell me if they didn't seem so. Also the next chapter will explain the title of the story and summary so you'd better stay tuned to know what happens next. Also pls R&R my other stories. I don't feel like writing their names down so pls go to my profile to know what they are about. Pls also review the stories written by **daxterandboxer. **They're awesome I assure you!Thanks and until next time!


	2. Cross Dresser Island

A/N :

**A/N**: YES! I have finally finished the second chapter of this story! -someone applauds in the background- I can't believe It took me so long to get me to write it. I wasted a whole month doing absolutely nothing! Anyway now it's here and you know what? Something truly horrible is gonna happen to Sanji in this chapter (well more than one thing actually) but before that, is a little Luffy adventure. How and from whom did he get the money to pay Sanji back for the meat? I didn't know myself so I decided to include that as well XD

Plus, for those who will be so kind as to review afterwards (8 reviews for the ist chapter. Not complaining but I would have liked more) I'm soon going to start a new Death Note story called Black Ripper. It's based on the Jack Ripper killings. (Summary at the bottom of my profile). For those who review and also like Death Note, could u tell me if u would be interested in reading something like Black Ripper, I mean crime/horror. That kind of story? I would appreciate that thanks.

I also have another unfinished story here called Cursed Hero. (A DBZ/Naruto crossover) To make it straight I am no longer interested in continuing. But I don't have the heart to delete it cause maybe someday I might just wake up and think mmm I have such an awesome idea for it! I must continue it immediately! but I highly doubt that it will happen

**Disclaimer:** All One Piece characters in this story (plus the Thousand Sunny) belong to Eiichiro Oda. I own nothing except Angie, her dad and an old ginger haired man wearing a kilt (you'll know who they are once you read). Wait! Maybe I own cross dresser island too!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Chapter 2 : Cross Dresser Island**

**5am**

Two days later, Luffy was the first one to wake up. This was quite a rare event since it was widely known that the Straw Hat Pirates' captain was a heavy sleeper and not even a whole army of Marines poking their rifles in his face could ever hope to wake him up. But this was no mere coincidence. Monkey D. Luffy had a plan.

xxxxxx

**2 hours later – 7am**

BEEP…BEEP…BEEP…BEEP…BEEEEEEEEEEEP!

Luffy was sitting silently on the Sunny's head observing the still waters around them when a strange noise cut through his thoughts of food and…more food. At first he was confused by what the weird noise might be but quickly enough understood what it was. Luffy reached a hand into his trousers' pocket and pulled out a small, black walkie-talkie. He stared at it for a few seconds, then pressed a button and answered it, bringing the small box closer to his mouth.

"Meat Eater here; where are you Pinocchio?"

"I TOLD YOU TO STOP CALLING ME THAT!" answered an angry voice.

"No way it suits you Usopp. You know you _do_ look like Pinocchio, Admit it!" retorted Luffy, for what seemed to be the hundredth time that day.

"NO! I'm much more better looking than that stupid fairytale puppet Pinocchio. His nose can't even be compared to my beautiful one. It isn't as long, as thin and as tanned as mine!"

"No way! Are you telling me you're jealous of a puppet that doesn't even exist?" sniggered Luffy as laughter started to take over him.

"N…no I never said that you idiot. I'm just stating the obvious. Never mind, tell me where are you anyway!" said Usopp from his end.

But he was certain that Luffy hadn't even heard. He could now hear his captain roaring with laughter through the walkie-talkie.

"LUFFY! TELL ME WHERE ARE YOU" yelled Usopp.

….

"Luffy?"

….

"OI LUFFY STOP LAUGHING AND ANSWER ME!"

"S…sorry, I got carried away. But I asked first! Where are _you_?"

"Fine. I'm down here in the men's quarters." answered a frustrated Usopp. Chopper's just left. He should be on deck right now so it's time to put the plan into action! Go… wherever you are."

"OK, Roger…Pinocchio"

"LUFFY!! I'll…"

But Luffy didn't wait to hear what Usopp would do to him. He put the walkie-talkie back into his pocket and quickly scanned the deck looking for a little reindeer wearing a red top hat too large for his head. He found Chopper in the middle of the deck, sorting some little jars containing different coloured liquids on a table. He immediately jumped off the Sunny's head and quietly made his way towards the reindeer, trying to be as casual as possible.

xxxxxx

**Begin Flashback**

A day after the meat incident, Luffy had accidentally overheard Chopper talking to Nami about a small amount of gold which he had saved up till that point without telling anyone about it's existence. He had heard the little doctor tell their navigator that he hoped to buy some new medicines once they reached the next island. Now Luffy currently hadn't any money to repay Sanji for the stolen meat. He had been wondering how on earth he was going to obtain enough money for the cook until they reached the island but had come up with nothing. Fearing the blonde cook's wrath, Luffy decided the only solution to his problem was to take Chopper's money. He already felt bad for thinking of robbing one of his nakama, but on the other hand it was for the crew's good (excluding Chopper himself who was vegetarian) and anyway was he or was a he not going to become the Pirate King? A bit of stealing every now and then couldn't hurt much.

But Luffy being the simple minded idiot he was, couldn't come up with anything to take Chopper's money without making the reindeer punch him in the face, or worse cause him to start crying like a baby. Here he needed to obtain Chopper's money in a way which wouldn't make him take it by force. Then it had hit him. Another game of strip poker! And whom better to ask for help then Usopp, the Grand Line's top liar and cheater?

Luffy had gone to Usopp, and surprisingly asked him in private to teach him how to cheat in a card game. The sniper was shocked at first that their captain who was so innocent at even seventeen years of age but as proud and strong as a forty year old man wanted to stoop so low as to learn how to cheat in a game of cards, but after Luffy had explained his reasons for such a grave decision, Usopp had gladly agreed.

So after having Usopp teach him how to cheat without getting caught, which astonishingly Luffy learned quite quickly, they had set up a plan. Both Luffy and Usopp were to wake up the following morning extremely early, before the rest of the crew. For Luffy it would be a problem, but he had found a solution to that too. Luckily the night before had been Luffy's turn to stand guard at the crow's nest. So he had decided that just for this once he would not fall asleep at all costs! To make sure of that, he had spent the whole night drinking coffee, which he had never done before and would surely never do it again. Coffee was simply disgusting! With Usopp's walkie-talkies they had communicated all night long, going over the plan and just for the heck of it, used nicknames instead of their real names, hence came the name Pinocchio much to Usopp's annoyance. Then the next morning, Luffy would find Chopper and challenge him to another game of strip poker. At that point, Usopp would jump out of no where and "accidentally" come across Luffy and Chopper playing. He would sit down and watch them playing and when Luffy would suggest that they play using money instead of shedding their clothes, Usopp would come up with a tale he had supposedly heard that if you didn't accept the conditions of a game proposed by your captain, the ghost of that same captain would come to haunt you till the day you die. It was a foolish story, but undoubtedly Chopper would believe it since he swallowed all the lies Usopp fed him. Whilst Usopp would be distracting Chopper, Luffy would be able to cheat without the blue-nosed reindeer noticing it and then the money would be his and Sanji would be happy!

**End Flashback**

xxxxxx

Just as Luffy was a few steps away from Chopper, the little doctor turned around. He looked amazed that there was his captain on the deck at that moment. It was so early! Luffy usually woke up around 10 or 11 am!

"Wow Luffy how come you're up and about so early? It's only 7 in the morning ya know?" asked Chopper. "Are you sick or something?" he said in a worried voice.

"Um yeah…I mean no, no I'm not sick, not at all!" What was he going to tell him now?

Chopper stood staring at him, obviously wanting a clear answer from Luffy who currently gaping idiotically, looking just as if he was just hit in the head by something very heavy but hadn't realised how hard it had hit him yet.

"Oh yeah you see, yesterday I was on guard and after a while I suddenly saw this HUGE thing jumping out of the water!" He threw his hands in the air trying to sound convincing. "And…uh…I didn't see what it was like you know? And it was an amazing monster, much bigger then the whole ship. I wanted to know what it was cause it was so cool so I stayed up the whole night trying to see it and then I saw it again! It was awesome! You know how many heads it had? It had three! Three heads! And I'm pretty sure one of them had a nose like Usopp's. It's body was huge and it had a pair of gigantic wings! It's teeth were so long and pointed, they each looked like one of Zoro's katanas! And so I ended up not sleeping at all trying to…Chopper what are you doing?"

Luffy had just noticed that Chopper was no longer in front of him. He then saw the chair in front of him move a little bit sideways. He looked down towards the wooden floor, and to his surprise saw the doctor under the table shaking from antler to toe. Luffy knelt down next to him and as he moved his face closer to Chopper's he saw tears flowing down the reindeer's cheeks. He understood what was going on.

"Sorry Chopper. Did I scare you with…uh what I saw last night?" he asked gently.

Chopper slowly nodded his head and as he wiped his tears away, he got up and went to sit back on the chair. Luffy now felt even more sorry for what he was about to do after seeing his doctor in such a state but it had to be done now.

"Hey Chopper" he said. "How about a game of strip poker to cheer you up?"

"Strip poker?" repeated the doctor uncertainly. Luffy nodded eagerly. "But you know you're lousy at that game!"

"No I'm not, I got better!" whined Luffy. "If you play with me I'll show you. You won't believe your eyes how good at it I became!"

"But Luffy, I've got a lot of work to do. How can you expect me to stop right now to play something stupid like…strip poker!"

"Just screw work for once Chopper!" yelled Luffy as he picked up the jars of coloured liquid and slammed them on the floor, almost shattering them. Instead of the jars, he placed the pack of cards Usopp had given him yesterday. Then he got in the chair opposite Chopper and faced his blue nosed doctor. Now let's play!" Chopper had no other choice but to obey.

xxxxxx

**Later that afternoon : 6pm**

"Here you go Sanji! I think this should be enough." Said Luffy happily as he handed the cook a small bag of gold.

As Sanji went away to count the gold and to prepare the shopping list, Luffy crept up to Chopper who was sitting on the same table in the middle of the deck, on which that very morning he had played strip poker with Luffy…and lost miserably.

The plan which Usopp and Luffy had come up with worked out perfectly. Luffy and Chopper had started playing, when along came Usopp to ruin everything, that is for the little doctor. Luffy had successfully managed to convince Chopper to play all his money and with Usopp's tale and his new found cheating abilities, won the gold in a short amount of time much to Chopper's horror.

Now Chopper was looking mutinously from Sanji (who was quite oblivious to the fact that a reindeer was shooting him murderous glances), to his money to Luffy and repeated the sequence several times. As Luffy sat down in the chair opposite to him again, Chopper turned his face the other way. He was very angry with Luffy for winning all his gold and now he couldn't buy any new medicines.

"Hey Chopper?" asked Luffy. "Are you OK?"

….

"Chopper?"

….

"Look, I'm really sorry about this morning but it was just a game right? I mean, well, anyway I swear by the world government that I'll definitely give you all the money back OK? Chopper?"

Luffy tried to give him a hug but just as he wrapped an arm around Chopper, he noticed that he was crying.

"What's up Chopper?" he demanded. "Why're you crying?"

The doctor sniffed loudly and tried to stop crying. "But what about the medicine? I was going to buy us some new ones with the money since ours are getting kinda old."

Luffy started laughing at Chopper's words.

"Why on earth would we need more medicines right now? Our crew is strong! And none are sick as far as I know."

"But who knows what could happen next!" exclaimed Chopper. "You never know when we might need them."

"You know what?" said Luffy as he got up from the wooden floor and turned to face the island they had just arrived at. "This island seems pretty big. I bet there is a casino somewhere around here. You wanna go have a look with me? Maybe I'll win some money and you can buy your medicines!"

"Really?" asked Chopper as a huge grin spread across his face.

"Sure! But we'll better tell Nami first. She'll go nuts if we disappear without telling her.

Chopper nodded his approval, and just at that moment they heard Nami call all the members of the crew over. They realised that they were the only ones left on the ship so they clambered down after Zoro who had just woken up from his afternoon nap and was stretching his arms over his head and yawning loudly. Clearly he was still feeling sleepy and wished nothing better then to go back to sleep in his usual spot on the deck instead of heading towards the loud, annoying voice on the shore which was Nami.

Once everyone was assembled, they grouped around Nami to receive further instructions. It was up to her to give each of them a job to do, otherwise they were sure to disappear within seconds of their separation and undoubtedly would not return for hours and anyway they were only staying at this island till nightfall. There was no time to fool around.

"So guys" she began. Everyone turned to face her expect Zoro who was already half asleep. On the other hand Sanji was trying to focus on looking straight into Nami's face but found it extremely difficult to do so because the streets were packed with women and he was trying to take in this beautiful sight as best as he could. Though some of them sure looked odd, almost masculine but he shook that thought off as a figment of his imagination. Sometimes so much feminine beauty packed in one place could make one feel quite dizzy.

"According to the map, this island's called…geez couldn't they find a better name than this?"

"What is wrong navigator-san?" inquired Robin with a sweet smile.

"The stupid island's called...Cross Dresser Island!" she growled disapprovingly as a slight blush spread across her face.

Robin's mouth formed in a small "o" of dawning comprehension whilst the others all burst out laughing as loudly as they could (including Zoro), earning a couple of curious glares from nearby passers by. Only two members of the strawhat crew didn't laugh along with the rest. Sanji had his mouth open in pure shock. He was staring again at some women passing by, they too looked strangely masculine as the ones which had passed before and now he understood why. It was not as he thought, his imagination but it was reality. This island was filled with cross dressers! Sanji slapped a hand over his eye. He would not see such people; he _could_ not see such people. It was not that he had something against cross dressers (even though he was afraid of them sometimes…ok every time he saw one). Oh no, he was just too shocked that he had mistaken them to be real women. And the place was full of them! Surrounded by them! Oh he would rather turn blind then continue watching!

Then a sudden loud thud made the miserable cook snap out of his nightmare. Luffy had thrown himself onto the hard gravel. His arms and legs were crossed tightly and his head was lolling from side to side. He was wearing a thoroughly confused expression on his face. He looked like he was trying to understand something but wasn't quite capable of doing so. Like Sanji, he hadn't laughed at the mention of the funny name of the island which was odd.

"Hey Nami" he asked suddenly. "I didn't get it."

"Didn't get what?" she asked in return.

"You said a funny word right now and every one laughed at it…cross dresser…what the hell is that?"

Everyone gaped at him. Even Nico Robin seemed surprised at the news that their seventeen year old captain didn't know what a cross dresser was. Even Chopper knew that!

No one answered him so he continued. "Were you laughing at that old man over there?" he demanded loudly and pointed towards an old, ginger haired man sitting outside a bar across the street who was looking in their direction. He was wearing a bright, red kilt and alongside him was a set of bagpipes. "Because he's wearing a skirt like a girl? That's rude you know! The crew roared with laughter once again, and this time Sanji joined in too. Even passers by who had heard what Luffy had said laughed along with them.

But apparently the man had also heard Luffy because he suddenly raised a fist threateningly in his direction, his face a ruby red and yelled some very colourful swear words at him before concluding in a wheezy voice: "So just because I wear a skirt doesn't mean I'm a bloody girl or -cough cough- a cross dresser you brainless little twit! It's a kilt; men wear them and anyway," He pointed at his crotch. "There's nothing wrong with liking a nice breeze down here every now and then."

Now the whole street burst into a huge fit of laughter. The old man angrily picked up his bagpipes and limped away, still muttering swear words at the straw hat kid under his breath. It was a full five minutes before the laughter died down and people resumed their previous activities.

Luffy still sat on the ground, awaiting his answer, but none came so he decided to ask again.

"So was that old geezer a cross dresser or what?" he asked loudly to no one in particular.

Robin answered first. "No captain-san" she said with a smile. "That man was Scottish. Scottish men wear skirt like garments sometimes, known as kilts. It's a tradition of theirs. He was not a cross dresser."

"But what _is_ a cross dresser then?!"

Robin thought about it for a moment then replied. "A cross dresser is someone who dresses as one of the opposite gender. Are you understanding me?" she asked him.

"Um…not really"

"Ok, for example, cook-san here" she said as she gestured at Sanji who was fawning over Nami and didn't notice Robin pointing at him, "is a man right?"

"Luffy nodded his head in agreement. "Yeah"

"And he is obsessed with women, you know that."

He nodded again.

"Now imagine that cook-san suddenly develops an infatuation for women's clothing. He starts putting on make up, wearing wigs, skirts and dresses, puts on high heeled shoes, and possibly fake breasts as well. Oh, and shaves his legs too. That's what a cross dresser is; a man dressing up as a woman or the other way round too, a woman dressing up as a man. Have you understood now?"

"Yeah thanks a lot Robin! You're awesome as always!" he replied as he finally picked himself up from the ground.

She just smiled at him and then turned to face Nami who was calling for their attention again.

"Come on guys, we've got a lot of things to do and we don't have much time to do them." She said whilst she clapped her hands together as if she was addressing a group of misbehaving 8 year olds instead of a dangerous and respectable pirate crew. "It's already 6 and we have to leave here by 8. There's a rumour that an army of Marines is getting here soon. We best be out of the way before they arrive."

"So, me and Robin have agreed to go shopping. I heard there are some really nice clothes shop around here and I want to take a look at them. Oh, and maybe we'll also visit a jewellery shop; I really need a new pair of diamond earrings. Is it ok with you Robin?"

Robin smiled at her. "Yes navigator-san it's ok for me, thank you."

"Now you, Usopp, Franky. Go and look for anything you think we might need a supply of for the Sunny. Wood, nails, whatever. Just be sure not to take long ok?"

"Fine" they both said, and they immediately took off down the street stopping every now and then to stare through a shop's window.

"Sanji-kun you…"

"Yes what is it you want me to do Nami-swan!" he interrupted her as he swirled around Nami with little pink hearts dancing around him. Zoro made a sort of grunting noise obviously disapproving the cook's behaviour, but it went unnoticed by the blonde. "I'll do anything for you. Anything!"

Nami sighed. "Please just go and buy us some food. You should already have prepared the shopping list, am I right?"

"Yes Nami-swan here it is!" and he reached inside his trouser pocket and pulled out a piece of paper which was so long that it almost reached the ground. Then he held it up just a few inches away from her face.

"Yes Sanji-kun, thank you very much. Just go along now and make sure you buy enough meat ok?" Then she turned to face Luffy. "You gave him the money you owned him didn't you Luffy?"

"Of course I did Nami!" he replied in a scandalised voice as he glanced at Chopper out of the corner of his eye. "Geez don't you trust your captain?"

Nami didn't answer but just said "Just go Sanji-kun" and the cook sped off down the street.

Then she turned to Luffy again. "And what will I do with you? There's nothing else important to do really."

"Um…Nami?" whispered Chopper. Nami looked down at the small reindeer at her feet. "Yes what is it Chopper?"

"We were, I mean me and Luffy were thinking of trying to find a casino once arrived and, you know try our luck there." Luffy nodded his head frantically at Nami who just stared at them with a confused expression on her face. Since when did Chopper and Luffy share a passion for gambling at a casino?

"Sure, why not?" she finally replied and the two of them were off in an instant. "That leaves only you Zoro. Well, why don't you just guard the ship? I doubt you'll find anything that interests you here expect if you like cross dressers. She and Robin laughed.

Zoro just glared coldly at Nami and went back to the ship, where he immediately stationed himself in his favourite spot of the deck and within seconds was already fast asleep.

xxxxxx

An hour later, a blonde man with a curly eyebrow emerged from a crowded grocery store laden with nine heavy plastic bags, filled to the brim with food. Sanji sighed in relief as he got out into the fresh air. Now the only thing he needed was the meat. He would have gotten it right there, but unfortunately for him there was none left when his turn arrived. Now he had to search for another grocery. He had been hoping to get to his beloved Nami-swan and Robin-chwan quickly and had thought just for a moment to forget the meat and go back to the ship to start cooking but then he remembered that Nami had specifically asked him to buy the meat and he understood that she really wanted it. He couldn't make Nami sad now could he?

After making sure that the bags were not about to tear as soon as he moved, he started walking through the crowd of people, trying to catch a glimpse of a sign that said Grocery or Food Store or even Butcher would have been enough. But no! There wasn't even one in sight!

He walked on for 10 more minutes during which he nearly had a heart attack after a large group of clearly male cross dressers had passed by him and winked at him. Not to mention the fact that they had looked him up and down several times, with greedy expressions on their faces and eyes sparkling with lust. One of them had even tried to spank his ass but by some miracle Sanji had managed to dodge that and had run down the street at full speed, the weight of nine heavy bags in his hands forgotten. Damn, some of the cross dressers here were gay too!

Now it was starting to get dark and he hadn't found a grocery yet. He checked his wrist watch and was appalled to see that it was already 7:30. He had only half an hour left to find one and get back to the ship! He desperately searched every shop he could see and finally, just around the corner there it was! A shop called Angie's Grocery. He laughed joyfully and sped into the shop. There was no one. Perfect. It would only take him a couple of minutes to buy the meat and be off. He laid the bags on the floor next to the counter and rang a small, silver bell which was there in front of him. Almost immediately, a young woman appeared through a back door. Sanji's cigarette dropped from his mouth onto the counter at the sight of her. She was beautiful! A slender figure, long dark hair which fell past her shoulders, bright green eyes and a voluptuous chest. She was wearing a pair of torn jeans and a white shirt that showed her midriff. It complemented her figure perfectly.

"What can I do for you sir?" she asked in a small, sweet voice. Sanji instantly broke out of his trance.

"I…I…uh…I need 60kg of red meat please."

"Wow that sure is a lot of meat! Are you gonna feed a whole army or what?" she said and laughed at her own joke.

"He he, well my captain eats a lot so I better make sure to buy enough for everyone."

"Oh are you a Marine?" She gasped. "But you're not dressed like one!" She looked him up and down. Sanji was wearing an orange, striped shirt and black waist coat and trousers along with a black tie. (A/N: I love his Water 7 outfit! ;P)

Sanji laughed. "Oh no, no. I'm a member of the Straw Hat Pirates. Ever heard of us?" he added hopefully.

"Uh, sorry…no."

Sanji sighed in evident disappointment. "Doesn't matter. We're still new to these parts anyway. By the way, tell me…what is your name?"

"Didn't you see the sign outside? she asked looking surprised. "It says : Angie's Grocery. I am Angie!" she stated with a smile.

Sanji blushed. "Oh, well I was in a hurry to get in so I didn't notice it."

But it seemed that Sanji no longer wanted to hurry up. He and Angie spent the next 10 minutes chatting and chatting and chatting on only god knew what. Sanji seemed to grow in love with the girl more and more with each second that passed. But that was quite normal for him. It happened with practically every good looking woman he met.

Her smile, her laughter and even her voice, made him drool all over the place like a rottweiler lying outside on a hot summer's day for hours and now the place was even swarming with bright pink hearts floating around Sanji in circles, only visible to him. The scene could make any passer by who looked at them plain sick.

Outside, a nearby clock chimed 8 but Sanji didn't seem to notice it or maybe he simply didn't give it a care. He only wanted to stay in this enchanted grocery, because surely, this grocery _had_ to be a magical place for him to meet such an amazing and gorgeous creature.

Perhaps the blonde cook was right about that, because a minute later another pretty girl entered the building. He looked at her. Big brown eyes, orange hair…she did seem vaguely familiar but right now Sanji had only eyes, I mean, an eye for Angie. Only when the second woman grabbed his ear and pulled it painfully enough to get the cook's whole, undivided attention did he remember who she was.

"Ow Nami-san it hurts!" whined Sanji. "Let go…LET GO!"

"SANJI, WHAT IN THE NAME OF GOL D. ROGER ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE?!" she screamed in his already overly stretched ear.

"Nami-san…I…" he began.

"I was worried sick about you! As well as the others of course." she added quickly. "Thought you were in trouble. Zoro even mentioned that you might have been taken away by some Marines or something. Then me and Luffy decided to leave the ship and look for you, and I find you _here_! Chatting away without a care in the world with this girl!" She pointed angrily at Angie to emphasise her point.

"But Nami-san listen to me…" and he told her everything that had happened to him since he had left them near the Sunny. "I'm sorry I got you worried about me. Just lost track of time! That can happen even to me. I promise to never, EVER make you worry about me again Nami-san. He nodded his head in agreement to what he had just said.

Nami sighed for the thousandth time that day. She forgave him but only because it was Sanji. If it had been Luffy or Zoro in his place she would have beaten them up so badly that they wouldn't even be able to recognise a man from a woman.

"Right. Anyway we must go now. We should have left this island already but thanks too you…" she trailed off as walked slowly towards the door.

"Um, Nami-san?"

"What is it now?" She turned around and faced Sanji again.

"Um…you see, I still have to buy the meat but…"

"BUY IT THEN!" she yelled as her eyes popped out of their sockets and she suddenly grew fangs. Then her face returned to its usual beauty and she strode outside, banging the door loudly behind her. Then she re-opened the door and said in a much meeker voice, "I am waiting outside. Hurry up." and went back outside.

"Um…then its 60kg of red meat ok?" said an embarrassed, blonde cook. "Do you need help carrying it? It's quite a heavy load."

"No thanks. I have helpers in the back room. I'll be back in a sec." she replied and was already through the door and out of sight.

"Hey dad" said Angie as she closed the door behind her and caught sight of her father who was sitting, a few feet away on an enormous wooden crate with the words MARIJUANA written in bright red on one of its sides and was reading a newspaper. Next to that crate was also another, equally large one labelled: DANGEROUS RARE DEVIL FRUITS. HANDLE WITH CAUTION. The man was a huge, with tanned skin, black hair like his daughter's and a thick moustache that covered half of his face that barely showed bright green eyes like Angie's. He had very muscular arms, and without any doubt could lift a hippo or two without breaking a sweat. "A bloke back there wants about 60 kg of red meat. Can you get go and get some?"

"Sure" answered her father, in a deep, rumbling voice and left through another door. A couple of minutes later he was back in the room, carrying a huge bag full of meat on his back. He didn't stop there though. He walked through the other door, leading to the room where Sanji was currently waiting, and dumped the meat at the cook's feet. Sanji looked at the man with a bewildered expression on his face. How could someone as big as him fit into a tiny shop like this? "Are you sure you can carry that kiddo?" said suddenly the big, bearded man in a booming voice (A/N: LOL!). His eyes swept to the nine bags beside Sanji and then to the blonde's thin, skinny figure and back to the bags again.

"Sure I can buddy" replied the cook coolly; as he lit a cigarette and put it in his mouth, replacing the one he had a few seconds earlier. "I'm much stronger than I look." With that said, he handed Angie's dad the money for the meat. The man just grunted in response and made his way back to the back room just as Angie herself sidled through its door, carrying a strange looking thing in her arms. It was round, with a stem sprouting from its top. It resembled an apple but was much bigger and was also a strange, pinkish colour. As she came closer, Sanji could see heart and flower shaped designs covering its surface. It looked quite cute to tell the truth.

"What's that thing you got there Angie-chan?" asked a curious Sanji.

Angie smiled at him and placed the weird looking object into Sanji's hands.

"It's for me?" he said in a confused voice.

Angie nodded. "A gift" she said. "So that you can remember me once you set off on your voyage" she added with a sweet smile on her face.

Sanji could shout with joy then and there. He was so happy that he hugged the pink thing to his chest and started swirling around the place, once again with an army of imaginary pink hearts circling him wherever he moved.

"Just one thing please Sanji" she added. Sanji stopped dancing around and moved closer to her. "That fruit" she said and pointed at the object in Sanji's arms. "Please I would like you to share it with no one else in your crew. Just eat it alone can you?" she pleaded.

"Er…why is that?" he asked, clearly confused at what the girl had just said.

"It'll make me very happy to know that you'll eat it by yourself. That only you will enjoy my present" she answered in a cheerful voice, though she looked a little uncomfortable as she said that.

Anyone else would have found her answer to be slightly suspicious but not our Sanji naturally. "Of course Angie-chan, anything for you!" he chirped.

"Than put it in one of your bags so no one will see it"

"Ok" he replied, and he shoved the fruit deep in one of the bags.

Just at that moment, Nami decided to burst into the room. "Are you ready or what Sanji?" she asked angrily.

"Sure thing Nami-swan!" He picked up all ten bags into his hands. He didn't seem to feel any strain at all in his happiness. "Goodbye Angie-chan" he called as he reached the door. "Hope to see you again some day!" And he was gone. Then, out of no where Angie's father appeared at her side.

"What was that thing you gave that kid?" he inquired in a deep voice. He was sure that he already knew the answer but decided to ask anyway. Angie said nothing but hopped onto the counter and crossed her legs. After a few seconds she started laughing madly and decided to answer her father's question.

"A devil's fruit of course!" she exclaimed joyfully. "What an idiot he was. Didn't even realise what I gave him." She added.

"Which one?"

She snickered at the thought. "The Girl Girl Fruit."

xxxxxx

**9:30pm**

"Where have you been stupid love cook?" asked a certain green haired swordsman as he got up from his afternoon nap which had now turned into a night time one just as Nami and Sanji had climbed aboard the Sunny and Franky had pulled up the anchor. "Got lost or what?" This earned him a kick in the head by the cook and a painful slap from the navigator.

"Be grateful that I found him or you wouldn't have been able to eat anything at all!" she snarled. "Is Luffy back Robin?" she asked the archaeologist, who was sitting on a chair reading yet another book.

"Yes he came back quite a long while ago. I think he is beneath deck with Chopper, trying to hide their winnings from you." she replied calmly, not taking her eyes off of her book.

"WHAT?!" she yelled furiously and in less then a second she was off to find her captain, probably to strangle him too.

"Winnings?" asked a dazed Sanji to no one in particular.

"Yeah" replied Franky. "Those two went to a casino and came back with five thousand beris each, the lucky guys."

"Whatever, I'm off to prepare supper" said the cook, unfazed by the fact that his captain was about to be murdered by the orange haired navigator, just like the rest of the crew anyway.

xxxxxx

**Supper time: 10:30pm**

Exactly an hour later Sanji, yelled at the crew that supper was finally ready. As soon as he said that, he glimpsed something red wearing a straw hat swooshing past him and through the door that led to the kitchen at a very high speed. Sanji caught the thing by the collar of its shirt as the thing let out a loud animalistic groan that sounded like "FOOOOOOD".

Luffy struggled fruitlessly against his captor but couldn't get himself free from the cook's tight grip on him. Finally he lost his temper and started yelling as loudly as he could. "LET ME GO, LET ME GO, LET ME GO, LET ME GO, LET ME GOOOO!! I'M HUNGRY SANJI, HUNGRY! AND I SMELL MEAT, MEAT, MEAT! LET ME GO NOOOW!!"

"Shut up idiot, you know that Nami and Robin have to always enter first! Geez, will you never learn any manners?" he said more to himself then to the flailing teenager in his arms.

"Ah Nami-swan, Robin-chwan!" beamed Sanji as the two women approached them. "Please get in quickly before Luffy devours everything. I can't restrain him much longer." He added. Sure enough Luffy was trying to bite his way out of Sanji's firm grip on him.

The two quickly did as they were told and as soon as they sat down on the stools surrounding the table, he let go of Luffy who literally jumped onto the food laden table and started to gobble up everything in sight.

"Oi, Usopp, Chopper, Franky, Marimo head!" he called. "You better get here quickly. Luffy has already eaten half of your share!"

In a matter of seconds, four figures swept past him and started to tackle Luffy onto the ground, trying to take three huge pieces of meat and a carrot from his hands. Obviously he had stolen them from his nakama's plates and apparently wasn't keen on the idea to give them back.

Sanji just sighed and re-entered the kitchen after his crewmates. Why did every meal here have to break out into a war? The cook made his way to the counter and leaned on it, watching what was happening before his eyes, I mean eye. Luffy was having no difficulty in keeping off of him his nakama and at the same time eating away at the meat. Though Chopper had given up on the carrot, and went back to his seat at the table thinking that Luffy had gobbled it up already but the teen had only stowed it in his jeans pocket to eat later. Meanwhile Franky had surprisingly managed to steal back his piece of meat by means of a very dirty trick, literally. He had found out that Luffy was very sensitive around his nipple area, so he had pinched one of his nipples and the result was immediate. Luffy let go of one piece of meat and Franky wasted no time in running off with it to the table though as soon as he looked at it closely, he discovered that his piece of meat was half missing! He cursed at Luffy, ate the meat quickly, devoured the rest of the contents on his plate and went back to join the wrestling match.

Five minutes later, the fight finished with Luffy sighing contentedly at the large amount of food he had eaten though now his face was full of large bruises including a black eye and a bloody, swollen lip. Also his nipples were sore with Franky abusing them for so long.

As soon as there was not a single crumb of food left on any of the plates, Sanji started to clean up the place whilst the rest of the crew lounged around the kitchen, chatting, sitting quietly or in Zoro's case lifting heavy weights in a corner. At a request from Nami and Usopp, Luffy and Chopper were re-telling their exciting adventure at the casino, whilst Franky was talking to Robin about the new technological, appliances he had bought on the island, including some strange items called a plasma screen and a dvd player. He continued to blab on about them whilst Robin sat opposite him reading another book, though still listening intently at what he was telling her and smiling whenever Franky stopped to catch breath.

At long last, after half an hour of washing and scrubbing and cleaning every single spot of dirt on every surface of the kitchen, Sanji could finally rest. He sat down onto one of the empty stools observing the place, tired but happy that it shined so brightly. At least at that moment because the next morning (or that same night, depending when Luffy got hungry next) it would be back to its normal appearance, meaning dirty plates everywhere and a numerous amount of stains covering the counter, table and floor. Sighing, the cook took out his pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit another one which he placed into his mouth at once.

It had been a really tough day. Cross dressers everywhere he looked, hours of waiting for nothing, having to carry ten extremely heavy bags which would rip off any normal man's arms for hours, Nami's yelling into his poor ears, that marimo bastard's taunting, cleaning the entire kitchen, not to mention the fact that he was still had the picture of Luffy's partially exposed manhood stuck in his head. And now he had guard duty tonight. Just great. At least one good thing happened today. He had met another one of this world's finest creations: Angie. His thoughts went back on how beautiful and sweet she was. He was practically drooling again as he remembered how kind of her it was to give him a gift to remember her for ever. The fruit! That's right!

He stood up suddenly, walked swiftly towards the fridge and opened the door. There it was. The pink fruit with the cute heart and flower designs etched into its surface. He reached out a hand towards a cupboard and pulled out a clean plate. He then brought out a long, sharp knife from out of the drawer. He put these on the empty table, grabbed the fruit from inside the fridge and placed it on the plate.

Now was the perfect opportunity to eat it without anyone disturbing him, especially a certain black haired, scarred teen. He picked up the knife and was about to cut a piece when he had second thoughts and brought the knife back onto the table. It was a souvenir from Angie, he couldn't just eat it after only a few hours that she had given it to him! He would leave it for a day or two and then start to eat it slowly. But if he did that, someone would probably find it and eat it themselves sooner or later. Every member of the crew visited the fridge daily especially Franky for his beloved cola and Luffy who came at least twenty five times a day looking for something tasty to eat.

No, he should probably just eat it now. After all Angie did make him promise to make sure to eat it all by himself and he couldn't break a promise made to a woman no matter how far away she was at the moment. So he picked up the sharp knife again, cut the pink fruit in half and then cut it into smaller pieces. The cook selected one of the largest pieces and bit into it. Almost immediately, he let out a high pitched scream of fear and surprise, in a voice unlike his own.

xxxxxx

Zoro was lying sprawled on the deck of the Thousand Sunny, halfway between consciousness and the land of dreams, when suddenly he heard a scream from inside the kitchen. He immediately sprang up, grabbed his trusted katanas and ran as fast as he could, expecting either Nami or Robin being attacked by an enemy. He unsheathed the katanas, placing Wado Ichimonji in his mouth whilst he gripped the other two tightly in his hands. He reached the door and tried to open it but with no luck. It was locked from the inside so without further ado, he smashed the door open with his foot. It crashed down onto the floor, breaking into little pieces, but Zoro didn't stop to admire the mess he had made. He was ready to kick some unfortunate asses but as he stepped inside the kitchen, his mind stopped working completely. Wado Ichimonji fell from his mouth, which was hanging wide open, with a loud clank on the wooden floor. It was followed by the other two almost immediately. He couldn't believe what he saw. There was a woman there but no enemies in sight. Much more importantly it wasn't Nami or even Robin which was standing before him but a beautiful woman with long blonde hair, baby blue eyes and…a swirly eyebrow? Oh…my…god…No! This couldn't be possible. It was Sanji!

As Zoro stood in the doorway with his mouth hanging wide open looking like a complete idiot, the rest of the crew arrived at the scene of the disaster. Luffy was the first to arrive, screaming at the top of his lungs. "AHHHH! NAMI, ROBIN. WHAT'S GOING ON? ARE YOU HURT? NAMI! ROB…wait you're not Nami or Robin are you?" he said as he stopped next to Zoro and took a better look at the blonde woman.

"Of course I'm not Nami or Robin you shitty, little, brainless idiot! I'm Sanji!" growled the woman angrily.

"Sanji?" repeated Luffy looking thoroughly confused at what the blonde woman had just said. Then he came up with the most intelligent explanation to what he was seeing that he could ever…EVER have come up with. "Ooooh Sanji" he began with a huge grin beginning to form onto his face, which looked slightly mischievous, "I never knew you were a…A CROSS DRESSER!" He then started laughing maniacally and threw himself on the ground banging his fists on the wooden floor, as if he had told them the funniest joke that was ever created.

This joyful moment ended soon though, as suddenly he felt a great amount of pain coming from his head. Nami had come from behind him and brought down her foot heavily on top of the boy's head, creating a nasty bump the size of an ostrich's egg. "OWWWWW!" he moaned as tears flowed down his already bruised checks.

Nami didn't take any notice of him and instead turned to Zoro was still standing transfixed on the ground, hardly moving a muscle with his mouth still hanging open and eyes bulging out of their sockets. Nami slapped Zoro across the face to get his attention and when he did look at her instead of the blonde woman before him she asked the question she was burning to know. "Who the hell is she?"

"Are you blind or what?" the swordsman asked her truly believing what he just said. "Can't you see the swirly eyebrow? It's Sanji!" And his mouth fell open again as he turned to face the woman that was once Sanji. This time Nami joined in too.

Seconds later, entered Franky, Chopper, Usopp and Nico Robin to witness this strange event. Robin looked mildly confused at what she saw whilst Franky, Chopper and Usopp joined Zoro and Nami in the "Who's mouth can open widest?" contest but it was unsure if it was because there was a hot blonde before their eyes or if they had realised yet that the woman was Sanji.

It was a few minutes later that someone spoke again.

"Is that you cook-san?" inquired Robin.

The woman nodded gravely and pushed herself into one of the stools. Robin imitated what she had done and went to sit next to her. (A/N: from now on I'll be referring to Sanji in she form) As she did so, Sanji started crying. Robin reached out a hand and patted her back gently trying to comfort her. "Tell us what has happened to you cook-san" she said. Sanji nodded.

"Well, I was here after I finished cleaning up, and I sat down to light a cigarette and rest for a while before guard duty. Then I remembered a gift a girl gave me this morning, when I went to by the meat. It was a weird looking, pink fruit. There, that one" she added as she pointed at a broken plate on the floor where pieces of pink fruit where scattered around it.

"Long nose-kun" said Robin suddenly.

"What is it?" replied Usopp.

"Could you please get another plate and pick up the pieces of fruit on the floor? I would like to examine them."

"Of course." And he did just as she told him.

"And doctor-san" she added.

"Yes Robin?"

"There's a book lying on my desk downstairs. Could you get it for me please? It has a red cover so you can't mistake it with another one."

Chopper nodded and was off in a flash. Meanwhile Robin gestured for the rest of the crew to sit down. Everyone did so expect Usopp, who was picking up the fruit and Zoro who was still standing motionless next to the door and didn't seem to have any intention to move from there any time soon.

"Continue cook-san" said Robin gently.

"I cut it up so I could eat it bit by bit but after the second bite, I started to feel strange. Then a sudden pain shot through my whole body, as if my insides were boiling themselves and then I started to transform. My hair grew longer, my face became more feminine and well…" she looked down at herself, still clad in black waist coat, black trousers and striped orange shirt which were now too big for her "you know what I mean." She felt the all the men's eyes stare at her chest which was now larger than both Robin and Nami's. Even Zoro couldn't help but stare, though after a quick glance he took his eyes off of her, with a light blush on his tanned face.

"I got it Robin!" yelled the little doctor as he ran as fast as he could towards the archaeologist. After he handed over the book and received a thankful smile from Robin, he found an empty stool next to Luffy who was still holding his throbbing head in his heads though there was no sign of any pain in his face, and sat next to him.

Everyone sat silently, hardly daring to breathe as they intently watched Robin's every move. She had picked up a piece of the fruit with her index and middle fingers and was looking at it closely, observing it's every tiny little detail. After a full minute of examining it, she put it back on the plate and opened the thick book next to her which to everyone's surprise and also sudden understanding at what was going on was entitled: The Devil Fruit Encyclopaedia : Everything You Could Ever Hope To Know About Them.

For a long time Robin flitted through its pages, occasionally stopping, perhaps because she thought she had found what she was looking for but apparently was not so. Finally at page 302, the placed a finger onto the book and cried "Aha!"

Everyone leaned in closer to see what she was looking at expect Zoro who was still next to the door and didn't show any intentions of moving closer to the others. On the page was a large picture of a pink fruit, covered with strange designs that looked very much like hearts and flowers. Sanji was staring fearfully at Robin, obviously dreading about the terrible things she could have found out about that fruit.

After several long minutes she closed the book with a loud snap. She faced each of the crew in turn and finally rested her gaze upon Sanji who returned her stare.

"I have found out many interesting things about this fruit" she started. "Some are good and some are…well not so good."

"Tell us" demanded Nami.

"Very well. The devil fruit that cook-san has just eaten…yes unfortunately it is a devil fruit captain-san" she added sadly as she saw the look of shock upon Luffy's face.

"Is called the Girl Girl Fruit." No one said a single thing so Robin continued. "It is a very rare and strange fruit. By that I mean that it does not grant its eater any special power, control over a natural element or the ability to transform into an animal, or in doctor-san's case" she gestured at Chopper with her head "gain human characteristics."

"Then what does it do?" asked Luffy.

"This one here" she said as she looked at the fruit lying harmlessly on the table" makes any man who eats it turn into a woman…permanently."

The crew shot Sanji pitying looks which made Sanji even worse than before.

"Y…you mean I'll remain a w…woman forever?" she asked not even daring to believe what she had just said.

Robin was about to answer but Nami interrupted her. "Where did you exactly get that fruit Sanji?"

So Sanji told them about how she had met Angie as she went to buy the meat and how she had given her the fruit, claiming it to be a gift from her.

"You mean that girl at the grocery store? _She_ gave that to you?" she said angrily as she pointed at the fruit. Sanji nodded. "But I was there! Outside the door I mean. Why didn't you show it to me?

Sanji paused for a moment before speaking in a small voice, hardly a whisper. "She told me that I should eat it alone. That I shouldn't share it with anyone else."

Nami slapped a hand onto her face. "Sanji. It's so obvious that she knew she was handing you a devil fruit. How on earth didn't you realise that?"

"I'm sorry" was her only answered as more tears fell down his face.

There was silence for a while before Sanji spoke again. "You know how I am" she said particularly to Nami. "I lose my head when I see a pretty girl. I couldn't think straight back then, otherwise I would have realised what that thing was." And started crying again.

Nami leaned over and patted the cook's shoulder gently. "It's ok Sanji. I'm sure that we'll find a solution to this mess. We're the Straw Hat Pirates after all! Am I right Robin?" she asked the raven haired woman.

"Yes you're quite right" she answered with a bright smile. Everyone, including Nami stared at her in surprise. "According to this book" she said as she stroked its cover, "there's another fruit like the Girl Girl Fruit but with opposite power. It's called the Guy Guy Fruit and it can turn any woman who eats it into a man, and I'm sure that it will work for cook-san here. That's because she's entirely a woman now. Perhaps she will still think, act and feel like a man now but the book says that about a few hours after the fruit is eaten, cook-san will change even in those aspects. That also means…" she shot an evil looking grin at Sanji, "that you'll start being attracted to men soon!"

"WHAT! NO, NEVER! THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN!" yelled the cook as she stood up from the table and slammed her hands onto the table. She looked at Luffy, Usopp, Franky and finally at Zoro next to the door, (A/N: I don't think Chopper counts) who were all staring at her or at her enormous chest really. The intensity of their gaze made her sit back down. She didn't want them to start drooling too. That would be completely disgusting.

"There's still one big problem left" objected Nami after she had slapped all the men. (including Zoro) "Where do we find this Guy Guy Fruit? Does the book say anything about that?"

"Yes as a matter of fact it does" replied Robin. "It says that the Guy Guy fruit can only be found on one island in all of the Grand Line. This island is called…" The archaeologist tried to stifle a laugh as she struggled to continue. "You won't believe what it's called navigator-san!" she informed Nami.

"Why, what's it called?" interjected Luffy.

"Manhood Island!"

"What's with these islands' names in these parts anyway?" cried Nami angrily as the rest of the crew roared with laughter expect Luffy who didn't seem to have understood what Robin had said. "First Cross Dresser Island and now this? Who named them must have been a real pervert!"

"Why?" asked Luffy but nobody answered him.

"Anyway" continued the navigator. "Luckily I have heard about this…Manhood Island and I think I have its exact location on a map somewhere. We should be able to arrive there soon enough. A couple of days at least, sorry Sanji." She added "but you must have a little patience. I know it must be really tough to go through what you're going through right now. We'll do the best we can to get you back to normal as soon as possible ok?"

Sanji nodded. "Thank you Nami-san and you to Robin-chan. You really helped a lot. I was going crazy before you arrived." The two just smiled at her.

"That explained the locked door" said a rough voice. Everyone turned to face Zoro who hadn't moved an inch since the whole discussion had begun. "The door was locked when I arrived here" he explained "had to crash it down to enter. What were you doing you stup…I mean Sanji" he said quickly.

The cook blushed. "Well I…I didn't want anyone to see me while I…felt the changes in my body." Everyone still seemed not to have understood so Sanji sighed and lifted her hands to cup her breasts. Immediately, all the men had massive nosebleeds (including Zoro and Chopper) whilst Robin and Nami averted their gazes from the blonde.

"OK everyone" bellowed Nami. "There's nothing more to see here. Go on, off to bed…NOW!" and she pointed her finger towards the doorless exit. "Franky make sure you fit in a new door tomorrow ok?"

"Sure Nami" answered the panty clad cyborg and left the room with Chopper.

Just as Usopp was going after them, Nami called him back over. "What?" he snarled.

"Sanji has been through enough today and deserves a full night of sleep."

"So?"

"So he, I mean she had to be on guard duty tonight but obviously she can't so you go instead of her."

"What! Why me? Ask Zoro or Luffy here" he yelled and pointed at the green head and the black head.

"Because you're the first my eyes landed on, so go!"

"Fine" muttered the sniper and he was off, whispering swear words under his breath at the orange haired navigator.

Zoro finally moved from the spot he had rooted himself into for the past minutes. He picked up his katanas who were still lying on the ground and was off after Usopp, but only after eying Sanji up and down for one last time that night.

Only Sanji, Nami, Robin and Luffy remained in the kitchen though nobody understood why the latter was still amongst them.

"Now Sanji" said Nami. "Since you're gonna remain like that for a couple of days you need some new clothes. Yours are just too big now." Sanji nodded in agreement. "So I'll be lending you some of mine ok?"

"You can have some of mine too cook-san" added Robin with a smile. "I think you'll look gorgeous in a skirt."

The three of them laughed.

"You shouldn't worry on how the others look at you too since now you're a very attractive woman and any men would be mad not to drool simply by looking at you. We're used to it" she sighed as she looked at Robin who nodded at what the orange haired girl had just said. "Just act normally as much as you can and everything will be fine."

With that said, Nami stood up from the table together with Robin. "Come on, I will give you one of nightdresses before we go to bed. There's an empty bedroom next to ours which no one ever uses. You can sleep there tonight cause it would be crazy to let you sleep with the men not to sat dangerous too."

Together they walked over the broken bits of wood on the floor and out of the doorway when suddenly Sanji remembered something. "Nami-san isn't Luffy still there?" he asked.

"I forgot!" she exclaimed loudly. "What the hell is he still doing in there anyway?" She went back into the kitchen to find Luffy still at the table, with an all too familiar confused expression on his face, which meant that he hadn't understood something and was trying to figure it out.

"What is it Luffy?" she sighed impatiently.

Luffy turned to look at Nami and when he had locked eyes with hers, he asked the question which had been bothering him so much. "Nami…what is a manhood?"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**A/N**: This took a hell lot of time to write out but I'm really satisfied by it. I think it's the longest chapter I ever wrote till now! and i'm sorry if it's too long for your liking but i wanted to get done with it. So ok there wasn't much ZoroxSanji but there was also a tiny little bit of FrankyxRobin if anyone even noticed. I promise that in future chapters there will be much more ZoSan so stay tuned. As always pls R&R. I expect a lot of nice little reviews after so much hard work. Also any constructive criticism is always welcome. Thanks!


End file.
